Insecurities

It may not seem like it at first, but I have a lot of insecurities. A teen? Having insecurities? I know, what a shocker, right?

But honestly, I have quite a few. A lot more that run past self-consciousness about skin flaws, acne, and messy hair. They’re more about my actions, my words, my personality, my health problems, mental and physical. They’re little things I would bring up to my friends and it’d get disregarded so I wouldn’t bring it up again. I’m overly aware of these things and how they make others feel.

On one hand, being so aware of them can be a good thing. It means that once I’ve caught on to what I’m doing, I can stop and apologize and explain the situation, especially if I know why it’s happening. On the other hand, I always feel terrible for doing said things, then apply that terribleness to just about everything else I do. Once I start to feel guilty, that guilt consumes me until I eventually break down, usually in private. Then I never tell anyone because I know they won’t care, or won’t know what to say. I can’t blame them. I wouldn’t know what to say, either, but I would try, at least.

Some of them I go about being unaware of without even realizing it most of the time until someone points it out in a way that isn’t meaning to be rude, but kinda comes out rude. Like never having money. I think this is a big one for most people.

Anyways, yeah. This would be longer if I was actually talking about what my insecurities are, but, well, I’m insecure about them.

Sorry this is so far between the last one? I got really caught up in school but I should be getting back to it soon as summer is coming up, and really the only thing I have to do for that is an online course.

See ya next time!

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